Airtel, please we are Ghanaians!

Hi peoples, honestly speaking I think the mobile telephone industry still has much to offer us loyal subscribers … which they haven’t given us yet. Don’t get me wrong! Things have come a LONG, LONG way, I remember in 2004 when TiGO was Buzz and I bought my chip for over GHS 17.00 (equivalent), the calls were billed per minute, not per second and the call chargers were a whopping GP 25 a minute. That really sucked.

Now with the advent of per second billing and the tariffs for some networks being a steady GP 8 things are looking up. But what about internet? Honestly even though MTN is the Most-Terrible-Network, they have the best pay as you go mobile internet package in Ghana at the moment (at least I think so) charging a measly GP 3 per megabyte as against Airtel’s GP 20. But on the modem scene for computers, the new kids on the block, Expresso, have the best 1 gigabyte package, coming in at GHS 15.00 a month as compared to MTN’s GHS 25.00 and Airtel’s GHS 30.00.

What’s the best network for callers? I think Airtel. Their calls are always GP 8 per minute, rain or shine, on network or off, and without any form of registration (bite that Voda), unlike MTN, whose zone keeps giving me GP 10 all day, I mean it’s cheaper to use Airtel to call MTN in the daytime, and that really sucks for MTN, unless you get that elusive MTN zone of GP 3. On the flipside Vodaphone’s habit of giving you 25%, 50% and 75% bonuses when you recharge is really cool. Ah well you can’t eat your cake and have it … at least that’s what the books say.

Well I’m just talking plenty but what I really wanted to talk about is the picture in the post. It’s from Airtel’s new promotion that they keep sending me 10 texts a day about. Now the real question is …

WHICH GHANAIAN WILL PICK MONEY FROM A POT?!

Are you kidding me? Is there no juju in India?

the SHOEmaker continued ...

“Hey boss, wey thing dey your bag inside?”

KD turned sharply, his sleepy eyes gazing at the voice that just spoke. The man was rough looking, and brandishing a long gleaming cutlass. It was 11:45 pm, KD was walking on a lonely footpath in Dansoman, there was nowhere to run and no one walking around. Things didn’t look too good.

“Why … you fit hear? I say wey thing dey your bag inside!” the man said huskily.

The man stepped forwards aggressively, shifting the cutlass from his left to his right hand. KD looked at him carefully and then spoke, his voice laden with irritation.

“Do you know how long I’ve been waiting for one of you guys? It’s been hours, a small test that I want to conduct and this is what I get? I thought you armed robbers were a little more punctual with your robberies”

The man stopped and looked KD up and down. What kind of nonsense was this? He had seen fear; he had seen anger but this? In fact it had been a long time since his cutlass has spoken with someone’s bones but this idiot was asking for it. I mean, the impudence of someone getting robbed! He grunted and charged at KD.

Almost immediately he stopped short. There was something metallic hovering right in front of his face; it looked strangely like the ‘under’ of a coal pot.

“Thrusters 35% output”, KD’s voice was hushed and quick.

 “Fire”

<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<    >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Ring! Ring!

I looked at the time, 6:15 am. Ah this foolish phone again, its only breakfast time and someone is calling me, they won’t even let me get to the station before disturbing my life. I picked up the phone and answered it with an annoyed, “Hello, Inspector Bediako here, what do you want?”

“Hello Inspector sir”, the voice on the line called out, “we have come across a charred body on one of the back roads near Dansoman roundabout O! We need you to come right now to help sort things out”

I grunted a muffled ‘yes’ and cut the line, this was the third one this month, can’t people just sleep at night?